Friends for Life

Social Groups Family, Kinship, Friendship FAMILY: Father And Mother I Love You How does a seriously ill parent deal with his/her kids? Should you tell your kids how much money you make? Family History family tree save your memories forever: Chronicle of Life The Modern Family family medical leave: maternity/paternity leave Home Marriage: alimony reform Parenting Personal Time sisters: Twin Sisters Bertheussen Kinship Friendship If you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you haven’t learned anything. Ali | How long do you keep your friends? sp | relationships: selection | saturation: Dunbar’s Number in general: fathers: F is for Family, Million Man March | adversity: A River Runs Throught It | beach: Dune-Water Dash sp |care services: care, carezone | dinner table | genealogy: ancestry, www.dnaancestryproject.com, mocavo | good vs evil: East of Eden Steinbeck |short story: brushstroke’s song sp | reunion sp | traditions: Turkey Bowl 1976 sp, No TV for 40 days and 40 nights sp gifts: thank yous: eCards > Balance | rule-of-thumb: something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read domestic violence: organizations & movements: Courage Connection, National Network to End Domestic Violence, No More books, movies, music: hindu boyhood: Sanjay’s Super Team | resilience: A List of Things That Didn't Kill Me Schmidt | Old man, look at my life, I'm a lot like you were. Young | happiness & harmony: The Secrets of Happy Families Feiler | dysfunctional: The Death of Santini Conroy | end of life: Rocket Gibraltar | expatriates: The Namesake | weddings: 112 Weddings

Theta Xi, 1967

by scott pickard

Back in 1967 when I was a freshman pledge at Theta Xi at the University of Illinois in Champaign, I had no idea that I would still be close friends with my pledge brothers 49 years later. Back then we were too immersed in the daily flow of being students at the U of I, pledges at TX, participating in intramural sports, dating, going to social functions, going to Illini games, and everything else that made up those glorious and unforgettable college days, to think about where we would be in a half-century.

Now say what you will about the good and bad of fraternities and sororities and their place in today’s diverse and politically correct world, I will stand by the fact that the friendships you will make at Theta Xi fraternity will be special and unique and as each year goes by you will appreciate that this is true.

My pledge brothers and I have come a ways since our days at the house: graduation, work, marriage, kids, grandkids, and now some of us retired. As the years have ticked by I’ve asked many alums about their experience at UIUC and most of them don’t come close to the bond and longevity of friendships we made at TX. So please consider my words as a voice from your future 50 years from now that if you and your pledge brothers work at it – because any lasting relationship whether it be family or friends or colleagues or girlfriends or wives, takes effort — you will come to cherish the same long-time friendships my pledge brothers and I do today.

There will be forces that will challenge your ability to hold on to these TX friendships once you graduate: working long hours, moving around the country (or globe) from one job to the next, and taking care of your marriage and family. These will be your top priorities during this period of your life as they should be. But my recommendation to you is don’t ever lose touch with your pledge brothers. It will be hard many years but all it takes is an occasional email or phone call to maintain the bond from year to year.

But the most important thing of all is when the various invitations come, show up! Nothing beats showing up, if you can. We all go through the same lifecycle of coming back for homecomings, birthdays, bachelor parties, weddings of fellow pledge brothers, then weddings of their kids, and then eventually, I hate to say, some funerals. Across all of these life events, being there is the greatest gift of respect and friendship you can give to a fellow pledge brother.

In 2016 my pledge brothers and I will meet up in Tucson, AZ for our 15th annual winter golf outing. We look forward to this event like no other. It is our annual “fishing trip” and it’s a great thing. We will have brothers coming from Arizona, California, Illinois, Ohio, Georgia, New York, Virginia, and Florida. And God willing, we will be doing this for another 15 years.

Because my fellow brothers, at the end of this fraternal journey these friendships will be all you have left from Theta Xi. -sp

medinah

Medinah, 2015

College


When it comes to college for your kid(s), what’s a parent supposed to do?

by scott pickard

Instead of saving $100K-$200K per kid to go to college, start teaching them how to master the skills of the lifetime online learner:

  • How to master independent study and research
  • How to master using the computer, software, and mobile devices
  • How to create and exploit one’s personal and professional networks
  • How to supplement online learning with daily engagement in the real world
  • How to achieve a healthy balance between the virtual and real worlds
  • How to survive and thrive in a rapidly disrupting world with new rules
  • How to define success for yourself, not by others

sp

University Disruption of BIG UNIVERSITY is starting in slow motion, but will soon accelerate very rapidly. sp Is a college education (average $100K) the largest risk in a young person’s lifetime? Is a college education (still) worth it? Will competency-based education be the BIG DISRUPTOR of universities? How has politicization of university governance (by state governments) critically damaged the university? Is the notion of the large, massive public university dead? Why? Can the university continue to be all things (education) to all people? Is a new approach to tenure needed to ensure the university stays relevant to students and the outside world? What is it? Is the footprint of the university just too large to sustain? (a) land; (b) buildings; (c) utility infrastructure; (d) academic programs; (e) athletic programs; (f) employees Can corporations mitigate this problem by buying and/or long-term leasing underutilized assets? What are the advantages and disadvantages to this notion? Is the university’s educational model increasingly falling behind the Internet-inspired leveling of the social playing field? If so, why? (a) old traditions; (b) old principles; (c) old programs & departments; (d) waning elitism; (e) obsolescence of tenure & “academic freedom”; (f) civil service-style bureaucracy; (g) union overhead What academic programs and operational functions should and/or could be outsourced more efficiently and with equivalent if not better quality of service? How much and how fast should the university migrate academic programs and operational functions to the cloud? What can we learn from California today to take action on tomorrow? Is online education a threat to tenured professors? If so, how would that affect their objectivity towards radical change to survive? What kind of changes would alumni want to see first before they step in to help out? Are universities vulnerable to the lure of short-term, job-hopping academic administration superstars?  Do they damage the university? Are too many kids going to college? (a) unemployment; (b) indebtedness; (c) happiness in general: competency-based education: flex | conferences: Schools for Tomorrow, Summit On Online Education 2012 big idea | democratizing education | faculty performance tools: digitalmeasures | fraternities & sororities: Theta Xi, 1971 sp | Massively Open Online Courses MOOC | online platforms: kaplan, straighterline, 2U | student loans: pay it forward NPR | students speak out: unitingillini | watchdog: Campus Reform books and articles: Academically Adrift Arum | Change.edu: Rebooting for the New Talent Economy Rosen | College (Un)Bound Selingo | Going Broke by Degree: Why College Costs Too Much Vedder | Mismatch | MOOCs lead professors to rethink online ‘classroom’ strategy Helenthal | Precipice or Crossroads? Fogel | return on investment (ROI): College Doesn't Pay for Everyone | Scholarship Reconsidered: Priorities of the Professoriate Boyer | The Great American University Cole | The Higher Education Bubble Reynolds | Will Your College Go Out of Business Before You Graduate? Cuban